20060125

Defining Sexual Harassment

(See here) a Washington Post article that reports 62% of college students report being victims of sexual harassment.

First let me state that I believe that sexual harassment is wrong. No one should ever have to endure sexual harassment. But how should we define sexual harassment? According to the article "The roughly 2,000 18- to 24-year-old college students who responded to the survey in May were told that sexual harassment was unwanted behavior and could include anything from suggestive glances to spreading sexual rumors and forced contact."

I think we are trying to apply too broad a brush to what is defined as harassment. Suggestive glances? Give me a break. If a young woman wears a micro mini skirt and I happen to drool a little bit as she walks by this is harassment? If the woman is not trying to garner a little bit of attention by flaunting her sex appeal then why is she wearing a mini skirt? What, if the quarterback of the university football team smiles and winks at her this is not harassment because his attention is desired, but if the goofy geek dares to show some interest he is guilty of harassment because he is supposed to know ahead of time he does not meet the woman's high standards?

I am not exaggerating just how far feminists will take this. While I was in the US Navy I was forced to attend a lecture on sexual harassment. The woman giving the lecture stated that women should have the right to walk naked in public without having to endure wolf whistles and catcalls. I probably shot myself in the foot when I did it, but I got up and told her (and the crowd) that if a woman did not want to call sexual attention to herself then she should dress modestly. That if a woman dressed in sexually appealing garb, such as a thong bikini on the beach, she was going to call attention to herself because she was appealing to males more base instincts. While some of the attention she was going to gain would come from the cute guys she was trying to appeal to, she better be ready to handle the broad sections of the population who were going to be attracted to her. That if a woman was not ready to handle the attention she should at least dress modestly.

I am sorry. When I go to the beach, I am going to insist that I be given the right to drool at all the young lovelies that run around in bikinis. If the attention I give these young women is "unwanted" that is just too dang bad. If I stare at them in abject awe at how beautiful they are that is not sexual harassment, that is human nature.

I once again will state that I am against "sexual harassment", I am also against date rape, and feel that when a woman says no, it means no. But I do not think it is wrong for a man to ask the question to which the woman replies to. I also do not think it is "sexual harassment" for the man to whine or even whimper a little bit when the woman says no. I also do not think it is wrong for the majority of society to tell feminists that when they include "suggestive glances" in the definition of sexual harassment they are way out of line, they have crossed the line into declaring war on traditional male society and they have thrown down the gauntlet. American society is not going to resort to neutering all males to make them happy.

Besides, some women still desire the aggressive, traditional male. If feminists desire a wimpy male I am sure they can find one, but not all women want to make the first move, and not all males are quite ready to hand over our testicles to the National Organization of Women or the American Association of University Women just yet. I will, however, join these organizations in insisting that even aggressive males better be ready to take no for an answer.

I am willing to agree that no means HELL NO until the woman says otherwise. However I insist that men be given the right to express interest and even ask the question under appropriate circumstances. After all, the attention might be desired, and the answer to the question might be yes. How are traditional males going to find out? Not all women are so forward as to grab men by the crotch. Some are still waiting for the man to ask them to dance before they get up there on the dance floor, and some women's dreams are fulfilled when they are asked to dance even when they decline.

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