Is The Woman Always Right In Sexual Assault Cases?
Is the woman always right in sexual assault cases?
(See here) where college athlete A.J. Nicholson has been accused of sexual assault and the fuss over his Coach's (Joe Paterno) reaction to the charge. NOW (National Organization of Women) is upset by Joe Paterno's opinion of what went on. I guess Joe should be publicly flogged for his insensitive comments, for daring to listen to his athlete's side of things, forming an opinion and then supporting his athlete.
I guess Joe just does not get it. When a man is accused of sexual assault he is guilty until proven innocent. The woman can make whatever claims she wants to against the man, the accusations can be publicly aired in the media, and the man has no right to defend himself. Pundits can drag out the man's sexual practices because he is the accused. No such public humiliation is allowed for the accuser. Once accused the man is always guilty, even if he is found not guilty in court. Thankfully we have not gotten to the point the man must register himself as a sexual offender based only on the accusation of a woman yet.
Let me share my own personal experience on a related episode.
I was alone with an attractive woman in my living room. I will admit we had no personal bond other then friendship. We were holding a conversation. During the conversation the woman kept suggestively licking her lips. OK, OK, maybe her lips were just dry, however the manner in which she did it led me to believe she was speaking in body language. During the conversation I got up, walked over to her, and lightly put my open hand up to her cheek. With nothing more then body language she let me know she was not interested in me. I accepted the rejection, turned around and sat back down. In my mind, "no" meant HELL NO. We continued on with the conversation for some time as if nothing had happened. Imagine my consternation when the next day, two mutual male acquaintances we had, accused me of trying to rape her. That is how she interpreted that which I considered to be a "pass" at her.
Talk about Post Traumatic Stress Disorder? I was traumatized by this experience. Do you know that shortly after that I had a woman knock on my door and ask if she could borrow my razor to shave her bikini line. She was gorgeous so I said sure. She followed me into my bathroom, took my razor, shucked off her jeans and commenced pulling her panties back to where it barely covered anything and giving herself a shave. I was afraid to even smile or raise an eyebrow because I did not want it misinterpreted. Yeah, I will admit I was a real geek when I was young. If she wanted me she was going to have to make the first move. Shaving her privates in front of me was not enough, she was going to have to grab me by the crotch.
Would you believe that the woman who accused me of trying to rape her, when she fell on hard times, had the nerve to ask me to help her out? She was looking for a place to stay and I was afraid to have her in my home again without a witness.
When men are accused of sexual assault they are guilty until proven innocent. Anyone attempting to come to their defense will be pilloried just like the man.
(See here) where college athlete A.J. Nicholson has been accused of sexual assault and the fuss over his Coach's (Joe Paterno) reaction to the charge. NOW (National Organization of Women) is upset by Joe Paterno's opinion of what went on. I guess Joe should be publicly flogged for his insensitive comments, for daring to listen to his athlete's side of things, forming an opinion and then supporting his athlete.
I guess Joe just does not get it. When a man is accused of sexual assault he is guilty until proven innocent. The woman can make whatever claims she wants to against the man, the accusations can be publicly aired in the media, and the man has no right to defend himself. Pundits can drag out the man's sexual practices because he is the accused. No such public humiliation is allowed for the accuser. Once accused the man is always guilty, even if he is found not guilty in court. Thankfully we have not gotten to the point the man must register himself as a sexual offender based only on the accusation of a woman yet.
Let me share my own personal experience on a related episode.
I was alone with an attractive woman in my living room. I will admit we had no personal bond other then friendship. We were holding a conversation. During the conversation the woman kept suggestively licking her lips. OK, OK, maybe her lips were just dry, however the manner in which she did it led me to believe she was speaking in body language. During the conversation I got up, walked over to her, and lightly put my open hand up to her cheek. With nothing more then body language she let me know she was not interested in me. I accepted the rejection, turned around and sat back down. In my mind, "no" meant HELL NO. We continued on with the conversation for some time as if nothing had happened. Imagine my consternation when the next day, two mutual male acquaintances we had, accused me of trying to rape her. That is how she interpreted that which I considered to be a "pass" at her.
Talk about Post Traumatic Stress Disorder? I was traumatized by this experience. Do you know that shortly after that I had a woman knock on my door and ask if she could borrow my razor to shave her bikini line. She was gorgeous so I said sure. She followed me into my bathroom, took my razor, shucked off her jeans and commenced pulling her panties back to where it barely covered anything and giving herself a shave. I was afraid to even smile or raise an eyebrow because I did not want it misinterpreted. Yeah, I will admit I was a real geek when I was young. If she wanted me she was going to have to make the first move. Shaving her privates in front of me was not enough, she was going to have to grab me by the crotch.
Would you believe that the woman who accused me of trying to rape her, when she fell on hard times, had the nerve to ask me to help her out? She was looking for a place to stay and I was afraid to have her in my home again without a witness.
When men are accused of sexual assault they are guilty until proven innocent. Anyone attempting to come to their defense will be pilloried just like the man.
posted by Little David at 1/09/2006 03:06:00 PM
2 Comments:
Yes, the woman is essentially always right, though that doesn't make it any easier for men.
As for your crotch shaving neighbour, I want to live in your neighbourhood! But seriously, perhaps you should have left the bathroom.
With regards to the woman who "accused" you, then yes, the sensible thing would be not for her to stay in your house. Or at least, you need to sit down with her and discuss things frankly... that you were upset that she had accused you when they were not your intentions.
Regards,
Michael Tam
As for my crotch shaving neighbor, I had expected her to take the razor back to her own apartment. I think she wanted the audience.
She lived right next door to me with two other girls. While they were my neighbors life was very, very interesting.
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